1. SET LIMITS
It is important for parents to realize that kids respond better when they are given an atmosphere of discipline along with clear boundaries. It is important for kids to know specifically what is expected of them, when they are to be home, what their responsibilities are and so on. Parents need to know to be parents not friends first. Kids need a firm but kind, guiding hand. Know who they are with, what they are doing, and when they are going to be home. Your children must understand that they are to call if there are any changes in their plans.
Parents should know who their children’s friends are. Have “get togethers” at your house so you can meet their friends, and let them know that they are welcome at your house. When I was growing up my parents always knew where I was because my friends were welcome at my house. So that encouraged me to be there most of the time. Encourage your kids in activities that will keep them busy and make sure they stay around positive people. For instance, involve them in a martial arts programme! No kidding. Steer them away from bad influences. If kids hang out with dogs, they will catch fleas. Constant exposure leads to a degree of contamination. Make sure they are filled with positive things, rather than contaminated with anything less.
2. TALK ABOUT DRUGS
It is really important for parents to get into the habit of having a weekly family meeting. This is a safe and valuable place to air out problems. Create an open forum for the kids to talk about the positive things in their lives as well as the pressures and problems. These meetings are especially important in the teenage years when the pressures are even greater to conform to their peer group. At these meetings show that it is safe to talk about drugs in your home, but it is not acceptable to use them. Let your children know that you understand the pressures, but will not tolerate drug use. This will also let them know that you are up to date with your knowledge. This will help them feel like you understand what is going on with them. We can all remember that phase of felling that our parents knew nothing. These little pow- wows will help to keep the channels of communication open and will keep trust bonds strong.
3. GET INVOLVED
Support anti- drug programmes in your community, school and government. Everyone can talk a good game. But it is more important to walk the walk. Parents, your kids know that you spend time on what is important to you. Show them that you care about them and their friends. Give them the support and opportunity to grow up healthy and drug free in their community.
4. GATEWAY DRUGS
Alcohol is referred to by the experts in the field of drug counselling as a “Gateway Drug”. That means that it lowers the users will to resist peer pressure to do other drugs, or to have sex, which can be fatal nowadays as well. Alcohol is a very dangerous drug. It is accepted as a social norm, yet it is responsible for thousands of drunk driving deaths of our youth each year.
Unfortunately, alcohol is so easy to get, it’s frightening. All of us can recall times that friends of ours drove drunk. Maybe we even did it ourselves and by some miracle we still made it home. Experts say that alcohol can lead to experimentation with other drugs. It is certainly has been the ruination of many a good person, and what’s worse it is responsible for more lost jobs, broken marriages and broken people than all other drugs combined!
5. DON’T DENY
It is important for parents to recognize and acknowledge when your child has a difficulty with anything. If you suspect that your child has a drug problem or habit seek help immediately. Talk to their friends, find out what is bothering them. If it is drugs, immediately go to a family counsellor in your community and get to the root of the problem. Mot kids do drugs as a means of fitting in or as an escape from pressures whether perceived or real. The earlier the problem is addressed the better. The drug addiction gets deeper and stronger with time. Drugs distort kids’ thinking so that they think they cannot have fun anymore or no one will like them if they stop. They need your love and support to beat this problem. Again - strong boundaries are important.
6. WARNING SIGNS
There are many warning signs to drug use. Parents, you know your kids. If they start acting strange and different, think about what could be causing it. Some of the classical symptoms of drug use are:
- Sudden changes in behaviour, either positive or negative
- Stealing checks or writing bad ones to buy drugs
- Bad Language
- Shoplifting
- Fits of Rage
- Over- sleeping
- Loss of appetite
Remember, many of these symptoms are cries for help. Kids want to get caught. They want you to step in and help. So do it. Be bold. Confront them in a positive way and ask them what is going on. What can you do to help? Be tenacious. Do not ever give up on them.
7. LEAD BY EXAMPLE
Many children see their parents at dinner or at parties drinking and even using drugs. Be responsible. Know that your children look at you for what they are supposed to do. After all, humans learn the most through modelling.
The other things they imitate are our attitudes, opinions and habits. Make sure you lead with a positive example. Don’t ever allow drinking around your children. Children imitate what they see, so don’t let them see negative behaviour.
Furthermore, try not to let them see behaviour that is unacceptable in public places. If they ever witness such behaviour let them know that you think it is wrong - even if it is something they see on TV. Whether it is violence, drug use, or cruelty to animals, let them know it’s not acceptable to you. You can use the media as a negative or positive example, and help them understand what is and what is not right.
8. EDUCATE YOURSELF
Think about how little you know about drugs. Your children know even less. They don’t know the dangers, or the consequences. You need to keep yourself up to date on all the paraphernalia of drug use. These can include such things as pipes, which are metal, stone, or glass which can be used for marijuana, crack, hash and other substances. Pills, which can be prescription “uppers”, “downers” like Valium, or designer drugs like “ecstasy”.
Vials, which are small glass tubes with a cap on it, are used to hold cocaine or crack. Small corners of plastic bags tied up are also used to hold any powdery substance drug like cocaine. Rolled-up dollar bills, small spoons, or straws are used to snort drugs up your nose. Model glue and many other inhalants are also used. Needles are used for heroine or steroids. Prepare yourself to recognize the indicators in order to protect your child. And counsel them about some of the warning signs they might see in their friends as well.
9. KNOW THE DRUGS
Be aware of the various types of drugs and the damaging effects they produce. There are so many drugs out there, the new ones are being invented all the time. Meanwhile, the old ones are making comebacks, such as heroin and LSD or acid.
Our new generation of kids didn’t learn the lessons of these terrible drugs like people raised in the ‘60’s did. Unfortunately, they are being swept up into the same problems that occurred in those difficult times. Tell your children that drugs damage brain cells, reduce the ability to compete in sports and in class, and have caused the death of some of the world’s most gifted people.
10. REPORT DRUG USE
Tell your child that reporting a drug user or pusher is not tattling but is helping keep children safe. Our schools need to be reclaimed. Informed children are an important line of defence. To become involved in drugs exposes the child to terrible consequences such as bad health, jail, death. It can also increase the chances of being abducted while under the influence of a drug.
Drugs are often sold outside school gates and even in schools by some pupils. According to recent statistics one out of four children, has smoked marijuana by the age of 16. This is a very scary issue! If you don’t think that drugs are in your school, you are in denial. This is a dangerous situation - be aware of it. Educate yourself and your children.
